I am not even home yet from Vermont, but have been scibbling my usual "to do lists" which I can typically read about 50% of when I actually set out to do the things. That's ok. Making the list is therapy.
On Thursday I leave home for 1 month.
I'm feeling anxious and overwhelmed and scared. I don't even know how to describe it beyond that right now.
Showing posts with label IVF #3. Show all posts
Showing posts with label IVF #3. Show all posts
Friday, June 20, 2008
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Obsess onward
The blood draw fiasco on Saturday ended with us at a s-k-e-t-c-h-y lab for our blood draw. We were told we could take the blood and ship it frozen, packed in dry ice, ourselves. The orders read that after two vials were collected, the serum should be separated out and put into a vial. Well, we got to hear a discussion among lab employees prior to my being called back...a discussion where they were trying to figure out which vial belonged to which patient.
Are you following me here?
There was no way I wanted that blood out of my sight. I could have been walking out with Joe Blow's blood who had been in there for a drug screen and I'd have Dr. S calling me to tell me my FSH levels were that of a man among other things I suppose. After much back and forth between Charlie and I, we decided to take the blood as is, and freeze the entire sample...not realizing the red blood cells break down when frozen thus rendering the sample useless for FSH testing.
Our nurse doesn't work on Tuesday, and our back up was swamped so we got the back up to the back up phoning us, and she was a heart. I imagine they've each dealt with their share of screaming mimis and hormonal, depressed infertile basket cases, but I've got to tell you, and I think Charlie and my Daddy would agree, my bouts of hysteria, both in and outside of the trials of infertility, take the cake. I wouldn't be surprised if they're chanting "no whammie, no whammie" when picking up the phone to call me on those days I am most likely teetering on the edge of reason. Anyway, she was very understanding, considerate, gentle, and most likely very thankful her name is NOT written on my chart.
She took my chart to the doctor and plead my case and promised to call back before she left for the night.
On her return call, as she was very firmly explaining the importance of knowing the day 3 FSH levels, my phone lost its signal. For a long time. Of course.
Nearly an hour passed and a voicemail just came through: you may proceed, but please know that had Dr. S known your FSH levels, he may not have recommended IVF (assuming they may have been high).
My last conversation with him entailed his general feeling, based on all other contributing factors, was the FSH was within reasonable limits. Past two REs never expressed FSH concerns, although I know that number can change in what seems like overnight.
We are pressing on, with the hope (yes, hope) that this is the only bump we'll encounter...you know....we'll have a lovely vacation, stimulate the follicles perfectly, retrieve oodles of mature eggs, have excellent fertilization, transfer two perfect 5 day embryos, become pregnant with twins, a boy and a girl, exercise and work throughout the entire pregnancy with the only sign of pregnancy being the cute bump I carry, and then deliver two perfect babies in April without drugs in a full face of make up smiling for the entire 30 minutes of labor.
Hopefully none of this changes by the time I talk to my nurse tomorrow.... Woo! Woo! All aboard! Crazy train is leaving the station.
Are you following me here?
There was no way I wanted that blood out of my sight. I could have been walking out with Joe Blow's blood who had been in there for a drug screen and I'd have Dr. S calling me to tell me my FSH levels were that of a man among other things I suppose. After much back and forth between Charlie and I, we decided to take the blood as is, and freeze the entire sample...not realizing the red blood cells break down when frozen thus rendering the sample useless for FSH testing.
Our nurse doesn't work on Tuesday, and our back up was swamped so we got the back up to the back up phoning us, and she was a heart. I imagine they've each dealt with their share of screaming mimis and hormonal, depressed infertile basket cases, but I've got to tell you, and I think Charlie and my Daddy would agree, my bouts of hysteria, both in and outside of the trials of infertility, take the cake. I wouldn't be surprised if they're chanting "no whammie, no whammie" when picking up the phone to call me on those days I am most likely teetering on the edge of reason. Anyway, she was very understanding, considerate, gentle, and most likely very thankful her name is NOT written on my chart.
She took my chart to the doctor and plead my case and promised to call back before she left for the night.
On her return call, as she was very firmly explaining the importance of knowing the day 3 FSH levels, my phone lost its signal. For a long time. Of course.
Nearly an hour passed and a voicemail just came through: you may proceed, but please know that had Dr. S known your FSH levels, he may not have recommended IVF (assuming they may have been high).
My last conversation with him entailed his general feeling, based on all other contributing factors, was the FSH was within reasonable limits. Past two REs never expressed FSH concerns, although I know that number can change in what seems like overnight.
We are pressing on, with the hope (yes, hope) that this is the only bump we'll encounter...you know....we'll have a lovely vacation, stimulate the follicles perfectly, retrieve oodles of mature eggs, have excellent fertilization, transfer two perfect 5 day embryos, become pregnant with twins, a boy and a girl, exercise and work throughout the entire pregnancy with the only sign of pregnancy being the cute bump I carry, and then deliver two perfect babies in April without drugs in a full face of make up smiling for the entire 30 minutes of labor.
Hopefully none of this changes by the time I talk to my nurse tomorrow.... Woo! Woo! All aboard! Crazy train is leaving the station.
Obsession Update
Obsession doesn't do any good. Blood sample was not good so not able to test FSH. Doubt this cycle will be going anywhere now. Will talk to nurse later today.
Today's cycle obsession
Charlie told me I could only have one a day. He knows I couldn't give all of them up, so he said I can obsess about just one thing at a time.
I'm very, very worried that my cycle day 3 bloodwork wasn't really at the start of the cycle (erratic cycles) and the results are going to be off, thereby delaying the cycle and how everything is falling into place as far as timing. I think if the cycle should really start now it'd nix the entire thing because I began birth control pills on Sunday which would yeild an inaccurate day 3 FSH level. I'll find out tomorrow.
And the worry on the back burner: to do or not to do genetic testing. But we won't talk about that now. I am sticking to the one worry rule today.
I'm very, very worried that my cycle day 3 bloodwork wasn't really at the start of the cycle (erratic cycles) and the results are going to be off, thereby delaying the cycle and how everything is falling into place as far as timing. I think if the cycle should really start now it'd nix the entire thing because I began birth control pills on Sunday which would yeild an inaccurate day 3 FSH level. I'll find out tomorrow.
And the worry on the back burner: to do or not to do genetic testing. But we won't talk about that now. I am sticking to the one worry rule today.
Monday, June 16, 2008
The plan, as of 11 a.m. Monday
- June 15-27 -- Birth Control Pills
- June 26 -- Travel to Minnesota for Vacation
- June 30 -- Baseline ultrasound and bloodwork in Fargo, North Dakota
- July 1 -- Begin Lupron (prevents ovulation), 20 units every 12 hours, and desxamethasone (steroid) at bedtime. Continue for entire cycle
- July 3 -- Begin stimulation medication -- 2 amps. Menopur in the morning and 300 units Gonal F in the evening. Continue until next ultrasound
- July 6 -- Travel to Denver
- July 7 -- 200 amps. menopur dose in the morning, ultrasound and bloodwork appointment, Gonal F dose determined after ultrasound and bloodwork.
- July 7-12 -- Continued stimulation. Ultrasound and bloodwork dates to be determined.
- July 13 -- Charlie fly to Denver
- July 14 -- Tentative retrieval date, Charlie fly home
- July 17 -- Tentative transfer date, if three day transfer ....OR...
- July 19 -- Tentative transfer date, if five day transfer
- July 19-21 -- Bed rest (unsure how long Dr. S will recommend)
- July 22 -- Erin returns home
The latter half of the schedule is a little fuzzy because it depends on how quickly the follicles stimulate (typically 7-8 days at last RE), the response of my lining, recommended bed rest, quality of embryos, and final decisions about genetic screening of the embryos
I am waiting to talk to the nurse to confirm monitoring in Fargo and then I will go ahead and purchase a plane ticket from Fargo to Denver and most likely make a car reservation.
Things I still need to figure out:
- When Charlie will be in Denver and how he will get there
- Dog sitter and what dates we'll need her
- Where my medication will come from and where it will be delivered
- When I should schedule my return flight
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
