Lundi Gras: Operation Free Freddie in Affect

It is a picture perfect day in New Orleans..sunshine, low humidity, cool temperatures, and the streets and restaurants are filled with people drunk with happiness and excitement. I'm feeling a little too rundown to be that high on the Lundi Gras spirit right about now. I have a little business to attend to.

Operation Free Freddie (aka Push da Kid Outta There) is moving forward. Rather than heading out to find an restaurant with outdoor seating, Charlie brought home some SPICY, salty crawfish and boiled shrimp. I imagine I'll be a blimp later tonight because of the sodium. I sucked on the heads and ate as many tails as I could get down.

Don't ask how much the cost, just enjoy them! he says.

Not yet in season, crawfish are $5 a pound.

Now I am pulling items from the costume box trying to figure out something for tomorrow...just in case we lace up our walking shoes, put in a 5 mile walk at 7am, and make it to Jackson Avenue for Zulu. I had abandoned my original costume idea with the intention of going a bit simpler.


Too bad this damn black tutu is a size x-small! Not sure how I'm going to handle this and whether it's worth the trouble of getting it all together tonight considering I may hit snooze in the morning and pass on this phase of the plan. Decisions.

Prenatal Monitoring

Who would have ever thought that someone would find this uterus so accommodating and homey that leaving just wasn't an option?

All was quiet today on the monitoring front. Uterine activity was minimal and the boy performed as needed, but wasn't overly active as he had been at my last visit.

My blood pressure is nice and low, 102/63.

The nurse thought him to be of "average" size, not wanting to invest too much in the ultrasound weight readings for him. She said depending on his position, there can be large variance.

Amniotic fluid is holding steady as well at 12.1. We were at 12.2 last visit. The women in the cubbies on either side of me were given measurements of 5.4 and 7.2 and were sent to talk to their doctors about potential inductions and cervix checks. Not the case for me and III.

We're going back on Wednesday and again on Thursday, and I have a feeling I'll be there on Friday as well.

For those of you more impatient than me!

Enjoying sunshine at the parade yesterday

It is still just two of us on Bordeaux Street.

Let it be known that I am...

• having contractions each day, some stronger than others
• having cramping that can be so intense it wakes me up at night
• eating spicy food each day despite protests from my tummy
• keeping up the walking routine
• feeling he's going to hold out for a March 3 induction

I am heading in to the hospital in a bit for another NST and an ultrasound. I don't anticipate any changes or progression, but I'll get the results up quickly.

40 Weeks 1 Day

I didn't really expect to be anything but pregnant today, but I am none the less finding still being pregnant difficult.

Last night after the parades on Magazine and a huge stack of pancakes a la Charlie, I crawled into bed and actually slept a good 8 hours. And it was good sleep, so good in fact that I don't remember making bathroom trips...which surely happened.

It's Saturday, the temperature is mild, there are parades in the neighborhood, we've been invited to a party but I don't know what to do with myself!

We've done our Saturday morning bakery trip and Charlie's gone to the lab to work just for a bit, but what are we going to do when he gets home? I actually have a huge list going...

• work on costume
• get black body paint
• vacuum
• fill bird feeders
• rake leaves
• pack sammies and head to the parade
• set up my new computer which arrived 2 weeks ago
• clean bathrooms
• bake cookies
• water plants
• connect co sleeper to the bed
• walk, walk, walk

Strangely I haven't the desire or motivation to do any of it. I'm sitting on the porch swing, listening to the marching bands warm up, watching the neighborhood step out, and the clouds roll through.

Prenatal Monitoring

Wondering if this will be the first of many monitoring sessions over the next week as we wait to see what the boy has up his sleeve. I wish I had had my little video camera because FCS was really putting on a show and my belly was pop pop popping.

I thought for a moment last night at the parade that I was leaking fluid. When I mentioned this to Charlie he seemed calm, certainly calmer than I felt inside and was trying to disguise. He told me he was excited!

Well today's monitoring revealed a perfectly normal amniotic fluid index (AFI) of 12.2. Normal for this point in pregnancy is between 5 and 25. The nurse said it can be hard to tell if there's leaking at this point, and to just keep tabs on it if it's not a big gush.

I was happy to get a look at him on the ultrasound because it has been so long since we've seen him! I meant to ask her how big she estimated him to be, but of course was distracted by just watching him move around on the screen. I know I'll probably get another chance to ask next week.

The NST test took a while. Again FCS was as active as he needed to be with his heart rate responding as it should. The nurse said I had an excitable baby and an irritable uterus. Lots of contractions coming up, which I suppose is a good thing right about now, but no definitive pattern picked up.

I need to head back in on Monday morning and do it again. Unless...well, you know.

40 Weeks

Well, dear boy, you've got about 19 hours left to make it here on your due date. One more day before Dr. M takes off for a week and a half. If you keep this up I'm going to have to get another pedicure. I'm getting tired of shaving the legs everyday, and the bag we're taking to the hospital is growing each day because I keep stuffing in outfits for each of us.

So enough already, show yourself!


Charlie is amazed that FCS is inside. Hello, have you looked at this belly? There's got to be a *huge* kid in there. It is amazing to think he's been growing inside me for 40 weeks.

Later this afternoon I'm going for monitoring. Perhaps he will tap out his arrival date when the monitors are on.


After feeling so terribly Monday and Tuesday, I've felt better, with the exception of my digestive tract. My body would rather run on empty, but I am trying to get in those last fatty, guilt free meals. Which, by the way, must be why my weight continues to creep up a pound or so each week.

I'm pretty worried about my ability to handle no sleep in the coming weeks. I don't function when I am not sleeping. Charlie should be able to handle me, especially since the guy thinks my emotional rants have been par for the course thus far. It will be interesting to say the least.

We're ready, Freddie. We promise.

Um Ba-bay Update

At 39 weeks 3 days:

Blood pressure: 124/78
Weight gain: +29 (+27 at home)
FCS heart rate: 130s (same as last week)
Fundal height: 37 (same as last week)

Dr. M: How are you?
E: Crabby. Cranky. Crampy. I am not feeling well at all today. (said with tears in eyes)
Dr. M: Perfect! That's great news.

Well, I thought last night might be the beginning. And maybe it is. I felt exceptionally crampy and I was having some pretty good contractions, but nothing regular.

After a night of no sleep, my crampy feeling returned gradually throughout the day before my afternoon appointment. For feeling so rotten I would have thought I'd made more progress. The cervix is soft, but dialation is still minimal at 2 centimeters.

Deep breath.

Friday is my due date. I need to go in for monitoring. Then I'll find out who will take over for Dr. M if necessary. More monitoring on Monday. After that there will be more monitoring, other appointments, and an induction is scheduled to begin the evening of March 3rd.

Dr. M did say he is very surprised my body is holding on, or that Freddie is holding on, this long. He'll be around for another 6 days, so maybe FCS will meet Dr. M face to face before then.

Something not related, or so I think, is this lump that I've developed under my arm that has had me in a state of panic for a few days. I was so distracted trying to focus on what he was telling me about monitoring, the new OB, and what the next few days will look like, I failed to even show it to him. I suppose having something else to fret over is a good distraction.

No 5 mile walk today. Hope tomorrow I can fit it in somewhere.

Next appointment: Monitoring on Friday, February 20th, D-Day.

This morning

Breaking down again, but I am dressed.

Sleep would greatly help my mental state.

Boiling bottles and breast pump accouterments. Looking at the swing parts all over the floor and wondering why I can't seem to focus on the directions to get it put together.

I think I'll go ahead and make a Mardi Gras costume. That will just about guarantee III will make his appearance and render my belly centric costume useless, right?

I am ready.

Um Ba-bay Update

At 38 weeks 4 days:

Blood pressure: 128/78 (same as last week)
Weight gain: +28 (+26 at home, same as last week)
FCS heart rate: 130s (same as last week)
Fundal height: 37 (same as last week)

Same as last week is the theme here. Maybe not completely, because he did say my cervix was looking better than last week with some effacement and a fingertip dilated. But my bishop score is still not looking favorable for labor any time real soon. I know that can change at a moment's notice so I am holding in the heavy sighs.

We talked again about induction, and his really not recommending it, particularly if the cervix doesn't have some major changes in the next week. He told me he wants to deliver FCS, but would rather see my body figure things out and get FCS here all on its own. Because if there isn't some radical change in the cervix, the chances of cesarean are high, especially with this being a first pregnancy.

On top of that he said he discovered earlier in the day that getting me in for an induction next week is going to next to impossible. Labor and delivery is booked as far as inductions are concerned with doctors scheduling inductions 3 weeks in advance. He seemed miffed by his colleagues doing this, but told me that if I was adamant about an induction he'd do what he could to get me in there.

So we talked some about risks of being overdue. None, he said. Absolutely none. Monitoring would be just a precaution.

And then we talked about what other doctors on the floor would be capable of "handling" me, the self proclaimed "hot mess." (While he didn't agree I was a hot mess, he didn't disagree either!) He said he thought we could arrange for another OB to take over for appointments but he wasn't sure about the delivery part of the deal.

So, as of today, we are on for another appointment next week, to reevaluate and discuss again.

Next appointment: February 16th.

This morning

I put on my jeans, and took them off. 15 minutes on.
I put on my red flats, and took them off. 5 minutes on.
I put on my rings, and took them off. 30 seconds on.

Do I really have to leave the house?

I feel a meltdown coming on.

38 Weeks

Here we are. There will only be one more photo in this series. Ok, I hope there will be only one more photo in this series and I do hope the belly is a mere bulge (yes, I know that's wishful thinking) and FCS is in my arms.


At 38 weeks we have reached the point where when I sit the boobs rest on the belly and the belly rests on the lap. It is something else.


I would very much like to live in the one pair of fleece pants that still comfortably fit for the next two weeks. Getting dressed is quite the chore lately. Tired of the same clothes, especially since they aren't even fitting now.

I've been having lots of contractions and cramping, some waking me up at night and many cause a wince and deep breath. All that and no "progress" evident in the cervix department. The wincing did prompt me to get that bag for the hospital all packed.

I've been pretty emotional lately. Crabby too. I thanked Charlie the other day for being patient and do you know what he said to me..... "No big deal. You're actually like this pretty much all of the time, even when you're not pregnant." I'm difficult. I'm emotional. What can I say. I'm just happy Charlie knows how to deal with me.

Still no decisions about the birth date and induction. With the due date being 2 weeks away I figure the boy may have a plan of his own and we won't need any other. I do have lots of questions for my appointment on Tuesday,

This week we went to the Hornets' game. During the "flex cam" segment at a time out, the camera man was tickled at the idea of featuring me, enormously bulging belly, on the screen flexing my mashed potato "muscles." And my husband couldn't contain his laughter in the chair next to me. Of course I've been getting emails and texts asking if that was indeed me, red faced and swollen, on the screen above the court. Sigh. Maybe by the playoffs he'll be back to show me svelte (wink), flexing, and holding III.

In 2 weeks we'll be parents. Our son will be here. I had my doubts this day would ever come. Charlie was certain we'd never ever be in this position. But here we are. Here we are.

Um Ba-bay Update

At 37 weeks 4 days:

Blood pressure: 128/78
Weight gain: +28 (+26 at home)
FCS heart rate: 130s
Fundal height: 37

Dr. M told me he was proud of me today! Charlie told me that a few weeks ago and it put me into full on schwoon mode, and now hearing it from Dr. M makes me excited as well...not quite schwoon mode, but it does make me smile to think about.

He complimented my hard work and good attitude. He admitted that things seemed a bit touch and go early on, but he is confident that we'll have a healthy boy very soon.

Fetal activity is something he wants me to keep close tabs on in these final few weeks. He'll get me in for a NST (non stress test) at a moment's notice to check things out if I am feeling unsure or uncertain about what the little man's up to in there.

The cervix is still closed and long. No signs of impending labor. Good thing says Dr. M because he wants me to be the first to try out the new labor and delivery set up which won't open until February 11th. He's quite excited about it. So, plan on looking for me on the 8th floor at main campus.

We talked about the due date and the option of induction. I'm due on the 20th. Dr. M leaves on the 22nd and doesn't return until 10:30 pm on March 3rd, 11 days after the due date.

He doesn't like to do inductions and doesn't recommend them, especially when the cervix isn't showing signs of being "favorable" for delivery, i.e. the current condition of my cervix. He explained an induction under those conditions would mean a high probability of cesarean, and although that's a perfectly safe way to bring the boy into the world, it isn't ideal.

BUT...at the next appointment we can talk about induction on or around due date if we should so desire if having Dr. M there to deliver is something I need/want/would feel more comfortable with.

He did say that after 40 weeks he'd request regular, several times a week, monitoring of the baby, but he has no concern with going to 41 weeks with that monitoring. After 41 weeks he'd start looking for a reason to induce. I didn't ask for an expanded answer, although next week I may.

Although picking a birth day seems perfect for me because it seems like a measure of control (even though I am well aware that he could show up before the day we pick!), I have reservations about induction and the potentially difficult labor to follow.

So Charlie and I have a lot to talk about before I see Dr. M again next week. Who knows....all of this could be moot and he'll be here tomorrow, right?

And I suppose I'll have to close the baby pool soon, because we may have more information, so get your guesses in today!

Next appointment: Febraury 10th

Out of control

Today makes 37 weeks of pregnancy and an estimated 3 weeks before we meet our boy. And for that very reason, I can't seem to write anything here. There seems to be nothing and everything going on all at once, if that makes any sense.

Probably the biggest thing going on that's not going on is that nothing is happening within my control. I am unable to resolve and settle many details because so much depends on his arriving.

• I don't know when my last day of work will be because I want to continue to get paid at a full rate of pay for as long as possible.
• I don't know if I'll return to teaching this year because I'm not sure if his birth date will put me within the maximum 12 week period of leave (half partially paid and half unpaid leave).
• I don't know who his pediatrician will be since the two highly recommended by Dr. M are not taking new patients. (So the decision is just to go with another doctor in their group and rotate through the group until I find someone I like. I am NOT going to interview doctors. I think I'll get better information from actual care appointments.)
• I don't know what to do about work or childcare next year. Taking a sabbatical seems within the realm of what is financially feasible, but I am unsure if it is the best decision financially.
  
• I don't know if in three weeks if making decisions based solely on finances rather than wanting to be with that little person is going to be so easy.
• I don't know if he'll take the breast and the bottle like I hope. And I don't know how I'll manage if he doesn't.
• I don't know how to wrap this damn sling, even after watching the videos.
  
• I don't know how to organize all of the photos I anticipate having and where to store the files.
  
• I don't know what size bra to buy.

Crazy train. That's all I can say. We're on the crazy train.

36 Weeks

Check out this boomba belly...

Pictures taken in the nursery!

It is amazing.

And it reflects light!


I cannot get over it.


The happenings at 36 weeks:

• My hospital bag is packed. Well, just about packed.
• And the nursery is just about done...no change from last week. We'll hang pictures tonight and we're waiting for the rocker.
• Everything seems to be "just about" done around here, and something tells me that is just going to be the new state of things on Bordeaux.
• I am not just about ready for labor, however. I have been thinking about it quite a bit and think I need to go in prepared to have a little chat with Dr. M about what to expect when I see him on Tuesday, even though I've read a lot...too much maybe?
• 36 weeks means not being able to get into bed without assistance, walking a mile takes at least 20 minutes, and nightly dreams include images of the boy as a cyclops.
  
• We're talking about the boy quite a bit these days. Perhaps the only thing we talk about more is when we'll get iphones!
• Car seats are going in tomorrow.
• Charlie continues to be so very helpful, putting up with the whining, taking care of the house, and just generally being better than his usual wonderful self.
• I got another "You've definitely dropped" comment the other day. Fingers crossed that his boy is punctual.
• Not many belly pictures left in this series...can you believe it?!?
  

Um Ba-bay Update

At 35 weeks 6 days

Blood pressure: 112/78
Weight gain: +26 (+24 at home)
FCS heart rate: 147
Fundal height: 34

Cervix still closed, and the boy is head down. Tested today for group B strep and hoping for normal results.

Hefty weight gain for 2 weeks. I know some of it is fluid, with sausage fingers and Vienna sausage toes (even more so than the usual stumpy feet), and some of it is the holiday weight making it's way on. Hoping to hold steady there over the next few weeks, but Dr. M told me not to worry, have my last hurrah which will come in the form of a sausage biscuit once a week until birth!

The fundal height is measuring behind but within normal range. I hope that is indicative of his dropping and not of my due date being later than thought or his growth slowing, even though I am hoping he comes in under 8 lbs.

Dr. M gave me the run down on what I need to be aware of in the final stretch, which pretty much boiled down to contractions and fluid leaking. He was also very firm about our needing to be in close contact over the next few weeks. He was heading down to do a cesarean on a woman whose membranes ruptured yesterday but she decided to wait until her appointment today to talk to him about it. Please call me, for anything, he said. Not to worry there. I have a feeling the crazy Erin he dealt with early on is about to make herself known again as I am starting to feel a bit amped up and pretty nervous.

We talked about work, and he told me he would write a note for me when I was ready, suggesting that I slow it down. He said working until FCS is crowning may not be the best idea, but as of now he won't tell me I have to stay home.

Next 2 appointments: January 27th and February 3rd.

34 Weeks

We are now in a period of "wait". We have no travel plans, no events, nothing between now and Um Babay's arrival. We are just waiting for him.


And watching the belly grow.


And it seems to grow bigger hour by hour before our very eyes.


The boy will be here soon, so make sure you click on the yellow box on the right and enter the FCS stats baby pool. I know who's reading and hasn't put in their guess, so get to it!

Other things going on at 34 weeks:

• We're pulling together a room, slowly bust surely for him. I have done two loads of laundry with blankets and onesies, both new and of the hand me down variety. (Thank you for everything!) I am now trying to figure out how to organize all of these tiny things...by size, by season...and how can you really tell what's in the dresser drawer when everything is so small?
• Today a few people told me the belly seems to have dropped. Maybe he really has shifted head down.
  
• I knew I had a great husband, but this week he's proven himself to be better than I ever knew. He's been very helpful around the house, doing his regular duties without nagging asking. And he's picked up many of the things I usually do, even though I know he doesn't find those things to be a priority (i.e a tidy, organized home) but he knows I rest easier when certain things are done. What a guy.
• Charlie has been busy reading instructions and manuals, putting together strollers, moving baby furniture, and readying the gear for use. Again, what a guy.
• We don't want a baby shower. We really don't. It's not that we don't appreciate the thought and sentiment, it's just not something we are comfortable with. We know you love us and want to show us, and believe me, we are feeling it. We look forward to everyone meeting FCS and celebrating his arrival. Plan on coming over in April for crawfish, beer, and baby passing. Or come over before and gaze at the belly before he arrives and help me get this mess of baby clothes organized.
  
• I am having some sciatica issues. It's already quite the pathetic sight to be waddling around the park and be passed by the elderly men, some with bellies bigger than mine, and now I am really left in their dust as I drag my numb right leg along. Earlier in the week Dr. M offered to line up some physical therapy and wants me to keep tabs on it for fear it'll get worse before it gets better. 6 more weeks. 6 more weeks. That's what I have been telling myself.

6 more weeks!

Um Ba-bay Update

At 33 weeks 5 days:

Blood pressure: 1o0/70
Weight gain: +22 (+19 at home)
FCS heart rate: 140
Fundal height: 34

Last night FCS was *very* active and lots of his movements were exceptionally painful and uncomfortable. There was also a point in the night were I felt my belly had all but disappeared. Ok, maybe not "disappeared" but it was flatter for sure.

And wouldn't you know after much feeling around and pushing on the cervix, Dr. M told me he thought the boy's was head down! Wow, just like that. He better remain that way. Now the little hard head I've been palming is replaced with what Dr. M thinks to be a round bottom.

Dr. M tells me all looks well, and the cervix is holding up nicely, remaining closed. He did say at 34 weeks he would not prevent delivery if FCS should decide he wants out, but NICU time would be needed. He talked to me about statistics of babies born at 34 weeks being on average curve for growth and development despite early delivery, so hence no attempts to stop labor from here on out.

I asked about pediatricians and he was very frank in his opinions about some names, although still very professional. He gave me some recommendations for pediatricians nearby, a few within the same hospital as himself, his daughters' pediatrician, and those he considered to be the best in the city.

We also talked about induction and cesareans. He's not a fan of either, but is willing to do either if that's the course I wish to take. My body, my pregnancy, my child he says, but as the date gets closer we will go over some statistics and have a more in depth conversation about it and come to a decision.

I also asked about his presence during delivery if this wasn't a scheduled birth. He gave me the items on his calender in the 4 weeks surrounding my due date. He's working on his MBA and has a weekend class in early March. He's not thinking that's a problem. But, he is going to be out of town with his family for a week beginning February 22nd, two days after my due date. Gulp. He told me it is important to him to deliver all of his patients' babies (rattled off that of his 180 pregnant patients last year, he delivered 173 of the babies!) and very much wants to deliver FCS.

Do you hear that FCS?!?! I sure hope he considers Dr. M's schedule.

Next appointment: January 21st. And then we're on for every week.

Desperate times

Desperate measure was averted this morning after much rummaging through the closet.

At almost 34 weeks I still haven't left the house in a tent shirt.

Whew.

32 Weeks

Well, I think it says something that I originally titled this post "34 weeks" and then had to quickly edit it. Oh, I wish we were marking the 34th week today.


I am feeling enormous, and it ain't just the belly. Everything is feeling tight and I am just generally uncomfortable. I am ready to have my body back. And I am beginning to wonder about the body I'll be getting back. Looking at spring ski jackets earlier in the week, I held up my previous size and couldn't imagine myself fitting into it. Couldn't bring myself to buy anything.

We have been splitting time between Denver and Vail the past week and I haven't had a lick of exercise, which certainly doesn't help. My breathing is a bit labored and the contractions are frequent and painful.


As for my tenant, he's doing just fine. He's back into the swing of things with his all night dance parties. I'm also wondering if he's switched positions as I am feeling less pressure on my ribs. I can definitely feel him on the left side, but I'm not sure which bulge is which body part. I hope Dr. M can provide a little guidance in that when I see him in a few weeks.

I am thinking about him quite a bit and wondering what he'll look like. A few dreams have had him as a cyclops which doesn't scare me as much as Charlie's teasing that he'll come out the size of Paul Bunyan, with whiskers and wanting to suck on a gallon milk jug with a nipple. (Charlie LOVES the Paul Bunyan stories.)


At the next doctor's appointment there will be 6 weeks remaining until "d-day" so I have been keeping a list of questions for him...delivery options especially if he's breech, work schedule, pediatrician recommendations. I have also made a list of "must have" items to order because the boy could decide to make his appearance sooner than later.

We are in the home stretch. Um Ba-bay's arrival is in sight.

Prenatal Monitoring

Of course he told me to come in, although he felt confident everything was ok, but he didn't want me to have any reason to lie awake at night, other than my usual bathroom trips and tossing fits to get comfortable.

Nurses in the monitoring unit were wonderful. Patient, kind, helpful. They hooked me up to the monitors and told me to relax.

Um Ba-bay passed his screening right away, kicking and his heart rate increasing with his movement as it should. Whew.

The monitoring of me, however, was extended as I had a contraction not long after I was hooked up, and I was showing some uterine "irritability". Those words pushed my heart rate way up. Things did settle down and I was told to monitor any cramping and to head in if I was having contractions or cramping more than 4 times within an hour.

To be clear, I am *not* in labor. This happens in some women, and isn't necessarily a sign of preterm labor. I am to listen to my body, stay hydrated, and remain emotionally and physically stress free.

Oh boy.